There’s a lesson that recounts a simple yet profound tale about grudges. The old farmer, steadfast and weathered, plows his fields with a mule. A visitor, perhaps well-intentioned, offers unsolicited advice: “Use ‘Gee’ and ‘Haw’ commands instead of tugging on the reins.” Practical wisdom, it seems.
But the farmer’s response reveals more than mere stubbornness. His mule, once a source of pain, had kicked him years ago. Since then, silence has been their language. A grudge, like a heavy stone, rests upon the farmer’s heart.
Yet consider this: The grudge weighs heavier on the one who clings to it. The mule, oblivious, pulls the plow, unburdened by resentment. The farmer, however, carries the weight of memory—the sting of that long-ago kick.
In life’s fields, we encounter our own mules—those who hurt us, intentionally or not. We face choices: to forgive, to release the grudge, or to carry it like a shadow. Perhaps the mule knows nothing of forgiveness, but the farmer does. His silence speaks louder than words.
So let us learn from the old farmer. Let us unclench our fists, untie the knots of bitterness, and let go. For in releasing the grudge, we free ourselves. And perhaps, just perhaps, we find that healing is sweeter than revenge. (Pulpit Helps)
One has to conclude from this story that the farmer was more stubborn than his mule for not letting go of the grudge he was holding. And, as it’s pointed out, that stubbornness led to a heavier burden on him than his animal could ever bear. The only way that load could be lifted from the farmer was to throw it off his shoulders through forgiveness by putting the past behind him, moving forward, and breaking the silence that kept him in bitterness and pain.
In Ephesian 4:31-32 the Apostle Paul gives this wise advice to anyone who can identify with this farmer and the solution for letting go of holding grudges:
31 All bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and slander must be removed from you, along with all malice. 32 Be kind to one another, compassionate, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. (New American Standard Bible, NASB).
Notice that letting go of grudges starts with believing God. Those who do not believe in God or simply question whether or not he exists are rejecting the solution to the problem. Truth is, unbelievers and doubters do not have the advantages that believers have when dealing with grudges.
Furthermore, it’s essential to believe that God gave his Son, Jesus Christ, to save us from our sins. Christ took our sins upon him when he died on the cross (Isaiah 53:5-12; Romans 5:6-8). And when we are converted to him, we are set free from the burdens that weigh us down such as bitterness and resentment. When we ask God forgiveness through Christ, we’re able to put the past behind and move ahead through God’s grace and truth (Philippians 3:13-16).
When this is applied through forgiveness and love, one will be amazed at the results—how it breaks the silence and opens up communication—thus healing the deepest of wounds and hurt feelings that have been there for too long (1 Corinthians 13:4-7). It definitely makes the plowing of daily life much less of a burden, for sure. In fact, Jesus takes the burden for us if we ask him (Matthew 11:28-30). And to top it all off, eternal life awaits those who’ve accepted Jesus the Christ as their Lord and Savior (John 3:16; 1 John 5:10-13).
Day after day there’s a lot of sad news about persons who hold grudges and the harm that comes to themselves and others as a result of it. But God through his Son provides the answer to troubled souls tormented in this way. Like that farmer they refuse to follow a better way—THE way that will bring blessings God wants to provide (John 14:6, 27).
I think it’s time to break the silence and humbly follow God’s instructions for a better life.
Good News to YOU!
Pastor Michael
P. S. Here’s a timely song titled, “No Grudge,” with catchy rhythm and meaningful lyrics by Bj’orn Pierre based on Ephesians 4:31-32, https://youtu.be/9_RmYcuTTp8.